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Matthew* expresses forlornness when speaking about this, because he finds it alarming to be sexually turned on by things he knows most people don’t find arousing.
Some men cheat regularly because they prefer the novelty of a new sexual partner to sex with someone they’ve had sex with before. Others are afforded extra sexual attention due to having been blessed with good looks, and choose to indulge themselves. If their committed partner is not interested or willing, they will seek sex outside of the relationship with partners who are.For example, most will tell me that they are chronically late for work due to staying up the night before, and that they view porn while at work or call in sick because they’d rather be watching it at home.(Less is known about hypersexuality in females, as it presents at a substantially higher rate in males.)These men almost universally have issues with anxiety and depression, and fears around social rejection.Serial cheating can occur for a variety of reasons, but is most commonly due to a mismatch in sex drive between partners.Most of us would imagine someone with an insatiable sexual appetite, but astonishingly, the “hypersexual” partner’s desire for sex is not usually all that high, and it is their partner’s desire that is low, compared to the average.